Nintendo Switch’s “JoyCon” Controllers Made For Trump’s Tiny Hands

With the Nintendo Switch being dated and priced–March 3rd and $299 bucks respectively–members of the press are finally getting hands on with the system.

Kotaku photographs provide numerous size comparisons of the Switch and its separate, detachable controllers, the JoyCon. One key reveal is that the JoyCon controller on its own is about the same size as a Game Boy Micro.

Normal hands are just too big!

We reached out to Nintendo of America to get comment on the laughably tiny size of the JoyCon.

“The controller is the perfect size for kids, customers residing outside of North America, and those with hands below the American norm of 7.44 inches from wrist to tip of middle finger,” Clint Rodham told us.

“There’s nothing wrong with someone with slightly smaller hands,” he remarked when asked about being so specific, “especially if your hands are 7.25 inches or so. Those are fine hands. Great hands even.”

With such specific measurements in mind, we asked the Nintendo of America rep if the company received pressure from the President-Elect of the United States, in the wake of his laughably tiny hands being remarked upon numerous times over the past year.

“Look, we make adjustments based on market analysis and not on conjecture. It’s evident the PEOTUS is behind the times in many ways–not that that’s a bad thing–ranging from loving a game of Wii Sports Boxing to making offhand sexist remarks.”

“We think he’ll love the online services the Nintendo Switch offers.”

Disclosure: The author of this story’s hands are perfectly average size.